Holy Awkward Batman!
There is this guy that I work with that is the most awkward person to have a conversation with. Not only is he difficult to understand (because of his accent) but also because he has absolutely no social skills whatsoever. He has on occasion known to hang around for way too long in someone's cube after asking a question, microwaving lunches that smell so bad people have evacuated their cubes etc. Today I am at the microwave warning up my lunch minding my own business. I see him from the corner of my eye heading for the fridge to get his lunch. I am hoping, no praying, that the doesn't decide to start a conversation with me. But I am up shit's creek cause he does. He makes mention of the fact that I am trying to get a transfer out to one of the Bureau's regional offices. How the hell he knows this I don't know. I make some kind of small talk, grab my piping hot dish out of the microwave and make a mad dash for it. Mean, yes but I don't care. I try to avoid him as much as possible, as does much of the branch. Now I have to figure out how to warmup my lunch and not have any contact with him. Oh, vey!
Hmmmmm... This could be difficult. Try eating a whole raw bermuda onion or a whole clove of garlic. That might do it...
If that doesn't work, you might try having conversations with inanimate objects like the water cooler, microwave, refridgerator, etc. whenever he's around. If he says anything, just tell him you're trying to contact the Mothership for further instructions... I found out a long time ago people are really afraid of crazy people, so acting crazy keeps the really nutty away...
;)
Posted by Thomas J Wolfenden | 2:06 PM